I watched a video a day or two ago about a girl's glow up journey and it was depressing. It was also scary, because it reminded me a little of myself - constantly chasing after something that made me a completely different person than who I was in the moment. Even during my proudest moments, I still couldn't be completely happy because there was still something about myself that I felt needed to be tweaked, or as I preferred to put it, "improved." Towards the end, she talks about two concepts we hear about all the time: self-confidence and self-worth. I always hear or see the phrase "love yourself," but how do you even do that when you don't know what that means? I really loved the way she explains it, so I wanted to write about it today.
To put it simply, self-worth is more important than self-confidence. The two concepts from a distance don't seem all that different, but they are. Confidence comes from feeling like you can trust yourself when it comes to what you can do and what you have done. This focuses on your abilities, accomplishments and skills. Because it is normal for this to be inconsistent, your confidence is something that can feel inconsistent. That is okay. It goes up and down depending on how we are doing in various aspects of our lives, so we should not base our identity and our worth on how confident we feel. We should base our identity on our self worth, because this is the knowledge that you are inherently worthy of love and care no matter the externals. It's a beautiful feeling of love for yourself, because you know that no matter the conditions, you deserve compassion, time, joy, acceptance, opportunity, encouragement, and for your dreams to come true. Your knowledge of this should not waver.
Accepting yourself is not about complacency, it's about looking at your situation without judging it. Observe your situation and your feelings. What you are going through and what you have gone through are neither good nor bad. Send it love and most of all, give it to yourself. When we judge, this affects our self-worth in a negative way and it causes us to go looking for external goals or people to receive the love that we lack within. Know that it is okay. Spend time with yourself. And talk to yourself as you would talk to a friend.
A few things I'm grateful for today:
I signed up for commencement the other day, the countdown begins! (May 29)
I am doing one of my internships at an early childhood center in town and I spent my day today in the 2 year old room <3 being a child development major has had its share of difficult moments, but nothing overshadows the genuineness and purity you witness from being with children all day. I love them dearly
I saw something in the light as I walked in the kitchen the other day that just felt like summertime, and it was like a rush of hope and joy took over my entire body the rest of the night. Something about a little bit of Vitamin D you guys... it goes such a long way for me :)
Katie ♡
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